Man I more than understand, I don't have kids of my own of course but I suffer from that "look at your uncle, no don't ... wait, can you help me with my kids?" syndrome.
Friends and family have always asked me to help them relate to their kids. They gravitate toward me for whatever reason at all ages, I think it's because I don't lie about anything (the cool toys don't hurt either). For the same reason parents ask, they also keep kids away from me. I don't give them social freedom, I put their ass on a mini bike and give them freedom to hurt themselves or not. Parents try to protect kids from things they are familiar with, how can you protect them from stuff you have no knowledge of?
It's precisely this that is why this country will have a shortage of mechanics and technicians very soon. We perceived wheeled machines as dangerous and pointed kids away from things that can hurt them so they don't know why a car runs. Wouldn't you rather your kids use a wrench to see how fast they can go than a needle to see how high they can get? They are going to push the limits, that what kids do. If a kid is so infatuated with driving, perhaps they should be required to understand every aspect of it. Starting with what makes it go, what it takes to maintain it, how to do it yourself and consequences of not following through. I wanted to drive so badly that I built my own car from spare parts when I was 14. I know that's not really feasible these days, but surely there are vocational schools that have programs. If there aren't, then there should be.
We are products of the 80's, didn't really rebel against our parents by running away because we didn't need to. We could sneak **** under their noses as easily as kids today can sneak **** under yours. Problem is, they have no where that isn't in the public eye to do it. Someone somewhere is going to bust them sooner or later, and the consequences are that much worse because now it's a PC thing. And the **** they are into is 10 times stronger and more available than we ever experienced. You can't be their friend anymore, that doesn't work. I think we've come full circle and expect children to be more adult then the are capable of. They have too much unproductive free time.
We give them freedoms that qualify them as adults. But they all can't handle it. A good 50 percent of them are just a tad immature and fall prey to the other half.
honestly, if I had kids right now ... I'd hold them back 2 years before starting them in school. Or maybe before high school ... they need a chance to grow up before being bombarded with all this electronic, sex, drug, social bull****.
This isn't advice, I'm the last to advise anyone on anything. I get in trouble by saying things I think others are mulling over in their head. I'm just glad you are doing something ... so many rely on government to raise their kids. Good job.
Your instinct to take them out of the influence is good, but can you succeed in cutting them off from it completely just by moving? Are they mature enough to handle the access to the world through the internet? Parents have so much to think about, I don't envy you and have nothing but respect for those who take responsibility.
I wish you lots of luck and don't give up. If you have to, ship them off to the middle of nowhere until them grow up. whatever it takes. Leaving children to their own devices in mass is nothing but trouble. more power to ya, do what you gotta do.
