Huh!!??
The Chieftain weighs about the same as the R3T, and its just another bike about which they say "it handles well for what it is." Its no Rocket beater on ANY public road. The differences will all be due to the rider's skill, except for the case you mention, i.e. the straight line race. Then the Indian will be left slightly ahead of the Harleys and the Victorys.
Mine is as quiet as any motor out there (probably due to break in and maintenance issues), and I've NEVER heard anyone else call a Rocket ugly.
I'd say you're smokin' old grape vines.